Stand on me see if I flinch
Stab me see if I fall
Any self-worth left in me
I have ‘on my own terms’ set free

It’s of no use to me anymore
If I’m honest it was wasted
on me before
Dont think that you’ve won
This is nowhere near over
I’m far from being done

Sun rises
Day breaks
Seeking redemption
A desire for perfection
Intelligent fists throb to the beat
The day pulsates..

For the scars no longer visible
The scars that run too deep
I await the day of reckoning
deserved wrath I know I’ll reap
Sex is like Water you drink then you’re done
quenching a thirst then renders it numb

Locked in a cage no one jails me
I’ve chosen to stay and not run
ln perfect rhythm the beat goes on
beats me..
beats you..
beats all of us..

Voices in my  head recall the life
I could have led - should have led
Systematic delusion is cause – most insane

Events can occur that I’m unable to explain

Yet in the cold light of day are really quite simple -

straight forward to convey

Sadness weighs heavy
head begins to wilt
Aches that pang – Fuel emotion
Senses are awoken once again
An overpowering sense of guilt

Which way is it I turn
Away from the lessons that I’ll never learn
Darkness starts to fall
- Reality bites -
An habitual response a routine call

Built inevitably to break
addicts are weak
obsessively reminded
By the bitter pill I now take